I wrote down these words a few days ago…

“What are you doing to distract yourself from what you need to be doing?”

I wrote them down and then moved on, leaving them behind.

Until today, when I returned to them.

As you read along, you may think the word “excuses” is more accurate than what I am going to call “distractions.” To that, I say, yes, they are excuses because they excused me from acting, but I think of them more as distractions because they are distracting me from who I really am. I’m getting ahead of myself, though.

Let’s start with this…

I am at the point in my healing journey where I’m dealing with some heavy stuff. My healers remind me to be gentle with myself. I thought I was being gentle. I now realize I wasn’t; I was distracting myself. Gentle would have been doing grounding and protection practices and daily journaling and meditation. Gentle would have been eating well and exercising. Gentle would have been releasing the emotions. Instead of going inward, I went outward. I binge-watched Season 2 of The Wilds, zoned out, ate junky food, skipped my morning and evening routines, and other practices that make me feel safe, grounded, and connected. But it’s ok now because I remember that I am a spiritual person, and I can choose my spiritual practices over distractions whenever I want to.